Week 12:

In recent months, I've found myself immersed in a period of exploration, where my artistic journey has led me down uncharted paths. This phase, though disconcerting at times, has become a canvas for transformation. Doubts about my abilities occasionally creep in, and there are moments when I look back at my work and no longer recognise the artist I once was. It's not a crisis, nor is it a motivational tale. These are just musings, fragments of thoughts that haven't yet found their place.

I've come to embrace this messy, undefined space. There's no rush to find all the answers now; instead, I'm allowing myself the freedom to experiment, to indulge in this chaos. What do I want to share with you in this moment? Is it the evolution of my skills in oils, or perhaps, it's the mundane beauty of my everyday life - cooking, simply being human? Everything we do creates something, leaves an imprint, even in moments of apparent stillness.

This message carries no definitive solutions, only dreams, actions, and sometimes, whimsical choices. My thoughts spill out, often too numerous to process in one sitting. I sense their presence, like whispers near my ear, but decoding them all remains a challenge. Through this blog, I want to convey that while tangible creations might be sparse right now, my mind is always at work, continuously evolving, perpetually aware - or at least, striving to be. I'm constructing a life where my art can open doors that words cannot, where my existence isn't that of an outsider, not in Britain, nor in the intricate tapestry of this life. And in this process, I cherish the memories of my furry companion, finding solace in the delicate balance between exploration and rootedness.

In the messiness of uncertainty, where ideas collide and doubts surface, there's a peculiar beauty. It's the raw, unscripted essence of life and creation. We all go through phases of not knowing, of feeling adrift in our thoughts. These moments don't make us lost; instead, they remind us that being unsure is a part of the process. We're here not just to have it all figured out but to wrestle with the unknown, to question, and to explore. So, here's to embracing the confusion, to the uncharted waters that lead us to unexpected discoveries. Let's navigate this together, finding solace in our shared journey of unraveling life's mysteries.